Slide
by JayBee-Bug
Summary: After the world doesn’t end, what is there left to do? (S/B, post-Gift, part three of Canary Cage)


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Title : Slide (3/3, "The Car Ride" series)

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Author : JayBee

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Rating : G

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Category : Vignette, B/S, Song-fic. 

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Setting/Spoilers : Takes place after "The Gift" in my own series

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Summary : After the world doesn't end, what is there left to do?

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Feedback : To: jaybee_bug@yahoo.com

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Distribution Statement: Go ahead, just keep my e-mail and name attached.

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Disclaimer : The song I use in this fic is "Let It Slide" by "No Use for a Name". Spike and Buffy belong to Joss Whedon and the actor and actress that make them come alive. 

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Buffy clawed at the heavy comforter that was wrapped tightly around her shoulders and pinning her down in her lazy and half-asleep state. She made a small sound of worry, unable to remember were she was and how she got there. As she slowly came to, and her eyes came to focus on the soft, pastel-like colors of her household-- she sighed and relaxed again, sinking back down into place. Everything seemed so muted and unreal here, so much nicer than the sharper colors of painful reality of death and gore, which made up such a large portion of her life. It was muffled and fuzzy here, though-- safe. 

Buffy noticed a steady rise-and-fall breathing next to her and, looking over, smiled, seeing her sister still fast asleep, comforter twisted and wrapped about, like a cat that had fallen asleep on a pile of clean laundry. Safe. She remembered repeating that word, over and over to her, not too long ago. The memories of the recent events started to flow from that point backwards through her mind, sort of like a delayed picture-show…it was so muddled, though. Like a dream. 

"Oh! Good-morning, Buffy. "

The Slayer moved to a sitting position and blinked several times, the voice having broken her out of her recollection. 

"Sorry, didn't realize you were awake yet. "

Finally she realized it was her friend Willow-- with an over-sized apron draped over her as she stood in the doorway from the living room into the kitchen, smiling brightly at her. 

"Ok, don't freak or anything. I have to, I have to say my little thing. "

"What's goin' on, Will? "

Buffy realized how drowsy she still sounded. Dawn began to stir beside her. 

"Oh, ok, well, see-- you don't have to deal with me here if you don't want. I can go away-- zip! " 

She gestured, grinning. 

"I-- um, I made breakfast-- and I can stay here if you want somebody around, or I could leave and you can eat later, or whatever--"

"Do I smell pancakes? "

Buffy smiled down at Dawn who had a child-like gleam in her eye upon awakening to the smell of food. Willow beamed. 

"Yep! Made em' myself! Hi, Dawn! Morning! Uh-- um, so, like I said, I could--"

Buffy waved off her friend's stuttering. 

"No need, Will, of course you can stay. Heck, the one that makes the food's ruler of the house, according to the Summers. "

Willow smiled. "Oh! Good! Ok! Well, come on over then once you're ready, we got-tons of food! "

As the two got up and made their way to the kitchen, Buffy realized just how much time Willow really did put into it. 

"Wow, Will, looks like an entire banquet here. Jeez! The nice tablecloth even, " she said, playing with the frilly lace it was lined with in amusement as she admired her friend's work. The redhead seemed very pleased that it was appreciated. Dawn had already started to help herself to a stack of pancakes eagerly. 

"Oh, dang, that berry syrup stuff-- Will, you're the best! "

"Thank you, yeah, I, you know, did my best-- didn't want to come too early and wake anyone up, came in around six-thirty-- oh, I'm so glad you like it, huh, I guess he was right after all--"

"Who? "  
Willow stopped, looked hesitant. 

"Oh, err…heh, well, sort of was Spike's idea, the whole breakfast-thing. "

There was an awkward pause at the mention of his name, as more of the memories tumbled down on the two. Buffy answered after a little bit--

"Oh, I see. "

Will nodded to the table. 

"Go on then, don't be shy. There's plenty, I had a bit of something to eat earlier, so no need to conserve. "

Buffy smiled and gazed at all her topping choices. 

"Right now's just a Spoil-feast, " Will clarified cheerfully. As Buffy served herself she decided quietly that she would have to visit him later on-- was only polite to thank him at least. 

~

Calm. 

It was like the calm after the storm. When he awoke, he felt it rush over him like a warm wave. His eyes slid back shut and he welcomed it. It was so comfortable, so tranquil. 

It had been a long time since he had felt calmness. 

In fact, most of his life had been spent in chaos, passion, pain, fury-- in the bowels of the most intense of emotion. Always riding on the edge-- it was the only way for him to feel alive. 

But now he realized that perhaps he never really knew what it meant to be alive, even when he had been breathing. This was new-- this was different. The calmness, it filled him with such a profound sense of meaning and peace. A few months ago such a thing would have disgusted him. But he had changed so much in just these past six months he was now completely unrecognizable to himself. A whole new person. Reborn. 

Such a shame that he understood that now but others would never see it. Could never accept such a thing could happen-- not to him, anyway. 

The vampire went back to sleep for the day and rose to leave his crypt as soon as it was possible during dusk, just for a bit of a walk, mostly.

~

"Spike, " she said, looking up suddenly. She had been gazing off into space, deep in thought, so was oblivious when he had entered. He had been standing there, watching her. 

The vampire had not been surprised at all when he caught sight of the blonde as he returned to his crypt. It just seemed he was expecting her, anyway, so it didn't phase him one bit. He simply moved in without a sound in his usual demon grace, quiet as a cat, and stood to watch her back as she sat on his leather couch, staring straight ahead at the blank television. And waited until she took notice of his presence. She now turned in her seat to meet his gaze and seemed surprised and definitely nervous. Buffy silently chided herself for being so out of it and licked her lips nervously. 

"Um, hi. Didn't know when you'd be around, so I thought I'd hang around a bit and wait…"

He nodded in understanding and moved to sit on a simple chair across from the couch, giving the Slayer plenty of space. She shifted uncomfortably, unaccustomed to Spike being so cooperative with her. The old Spike would have been yelling, shooting remarks, and doing everything in his power to get under her skin, but of course, he had changed so much lately Buffy had no idea who he even was anymore. It was confusing and, to be frank, distressing as heck. 

"Um, in case you haven't noticed by now, I just came down, cuz, well. To thank you, I guess. "

She couldn't believe how awkward she had suddenly become around him lately and how bizarre the words still sounded being said to _him. _They just didn't seem to fit and yet she didn't know if she could do any better. 

"Dawn-- she wanted me to say thanks for the pancakes, " she said, giving a sheepish smile, and Spike grinned good-naturally at that, making the Slayer feel a bit more at ease. He finally spoke, his voice quiet and pleased sounding. 

"Liked em', huh. Thought she would. Told me you used to have em' all the time when you were feeling a bit out of sorts. "

Buffy nodded. "Yeah. That's right . . . "

She looked back up at him, more seriously this time, realizing she was shying away from the true reason she came here. He continued to watch her calmly, respectfully. 

"But I don't mean just that. I mean-- everything. For-- you know, not letting me down. "

She watched him and his expression and manner never seemed to change much, besides his blue eyes flickering, as if she could see the gears turning in his head reflected in their color. 

"Right. Well, you know. I made a promise. "

He said it as if that explained everything. She nodded as if to accept that. 

"Yeah. You did. And--" 

She sighed at herself in annoyance at how hard it was to say these things. "I guess what I'm trying to say here is, that it's major points in my book to keep promises. That's all. "

He gave a small, polite smile. She tilted her head at him as if trying to figure him out. 

"Spike, you're . . . "

She hesitated, suddenly looking nerve to continue her line of thought. 

"I'm what? "

"You're…different. "

He seemed to really ponder her comment. 

"I think so too. "

The Slayer shifted again, not knowing were this conversation was going. He seemed hardly aware of her presence anyway, he was so occupied with his own thoughts. 

"What are you thinking? "

He looked up at her at this question, and she could see how badly he wanted to be honest with her. 

"Wondering. "

"About what? "

He paused to gaze off into nothingness for a moment, only it looked more like he was really looking at something, and Buffy just couldn't see it. She got the oddest sense he was watching the horizon. Which was ridiculous, of course, since they were indoors, but…it had been odd lately anyway. 

"What do you think you'll be doing tomorrow? "

She wrinkled her nose at the unexpected inquiry. 

"Why? You want to ask me out on a date? "

He grinned briefly at her. 

"Oh, sure. "

She rolled her eyes at his sarcasm, and then considered his question. 

"I don't know, Spike. More of the same, I guess. The world didn't end, so I'm pretty much still the Chosen One, you know? "

She shrugged. 

"Slayin' stuff. That's pretty much it. "

He nodded. "That's what I thought. "

She watched him and then frowned a bit, as it dawned on her it had sounded like he had just proven some kind of point he was trying to make. 

"So what are you saying? Getting a little cryptic on me here. "

He looked to her again from his thoughtful gazing and blinked. 

"That about says it. "

"Ok then…" she said, as obviously she wasn't going to get the thoughtful demon to explain any further to her what was on his mind. 

"I guess I'll--" she paused to restate her good-bye but decided it was probably a valid one anyway. 

"I dunno, chances are I'll see you around, huh? "

Spike seemed too lost in thought again, because he didn't answer her. She paused and then got up, eager to be out of the awkward situation anyway. It was on her way out the door that she heard him finally answer. 

"Goodbye, Buffy. "

She raised a brow at him as she looked over her shoulder a bit. 

"Uh…goodbye. Spike. "

And the door clicked as she left. 

~

Despite himself, Spike paused to admire the slick, black DeSoto convertible for a moment, gliding his fingers over the machine. She really was quite a marvel to look at. As he slid into the dark brown leather seat he gazed at the glossy part of the hood were his reflection would have been, thinking of how the black car most likely complimented his shock-white hair very nicely. As he put the key in the ignition and heard the delicious and satisfying sound of the engine starting up, he once again mentally thanked himself for snatching this beauty up when he had come across it. Quite a find, she had been. 

He set out, the cool night breeze rustling through the car's open cockpit as his only companion. And yet that was entirely enough for him. 

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I spend a day or nine

Then finally realize

There's really nothing going on

So why should I try to shake leaves

When there's no one in my trees

That I should care about

The highway he got on was largely empty for the most part. Sunnydale was a small town and most of its residence slept well, in blissful ignorance that they rest upon the Hellmouth. So Spike basically owned the asphalt for now. He enjoyed the smooth sound of the car gliding easily along-- so easy to just ride. 

Let it fall

Let it rise

Let it be and let it slide

Let tomorrow come and take my mind away

The reason the vampire had been so quiet tonight when he found Buffy waiting for his return in his crypt was because he finally understood now. He had been on the verge of this understanding and as he watched her sitting there, her delicately curved lips scrunched in a pout at the awkward situation, the way she wrung her hands together as if missing the usual stake she held in them-- as he listened to her say the words he had known would be said, he finally understood. And it rushed over him so calmly, made him smile at the simple and yet wonderful revelation. 

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I see the world get by

And watch my friends get high

I really don't care who's to blame

They love to point fingers at you

'Cause there's nothing else to do

But waste away my time

Spike now squinted at the horizon he was driving towards. It had a soft pink glow slowly forming. The sky began to meld from it's soft black into dark navy blues…so gradually. 

It was beautiful, really. He never had a chance to fully admire a sunrise. Even as a human, he never had bothered for some reason-- out of all the silly things he spout about in his poetry, that was never one of them. 

Let it fall

Let it rise

Let it be and let it slide

Let tomorrow come and take my time away

And it was all right that he would be alone to finally witness it-- he was finally all right with that. Because, you see-- it didn't make a difference anyway. He had changed, and she had seen it. He could score as many points in the Slayer's book as he liked, but he was still marked down under the 'Demon' section. There would be no point anyway. 

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Let it fall

Let it rise

Let it be and let it slide

Let tomorrow come and take my time away . . .

So he had simply learned to accept it. To finally realize that it did not matter anymore. And that is when he knew. That was all he was really meant to do-- that was why he was here. To learn that single and simple fact. And to just let it slide.

So when that glowing orb peeked up above the horizon, and dawn broke out-- that warm comfort spread over his body and consumed him. And he was smiling. 

__

Let tomorrow come and take my time away . . .


End file.
